
Love - a four letter word but when we try to define, it gives us a hard time to really tell what it is. It's way too complicated and broad to give a definition to. Sometimes, it blinds us. It prevents us to see the reality and makes us susceptible to being in denial and confused.
For instance, I'm seeing this guy for two months now and I am happy with him. He makes me laugh and comfortable when we're together. But, part of me says that I'm confused. Yes, I'm enjoying his company yet I still feel that, somehow, I am hesitating to invest too much emotion because of the fear that, in the end, I will get hurt. They say that in order for us to know if we really fell in love is when we got hurt. Bottom line is, I'm afraid that one day I'll see myself shedding tears because of him. My friends always tell me to get out of my comfort zone yet I didn't even exert an effort to really come out of it and explore. Bursting my bubble seems hard for me to do.
There are so many questions on my mind that kept the confusion coming in. Unsure , is what best describes how I feel right now. When we talk, paranoia is always in the picture - always present. He gets paranoid, so do I. It even made me push him away and he felt that for sure. He even told me that I got cold and distant. Honestly, I felt sorry for him. I didn't mean to hurt him by pushing him away and telling him that things were not working out between the two of us. Telling him that the relationship was going nowhere bruised his ego - big time. Guilt is what I felt.
We tried to straighten things up and he asked me to give him a chance to make the relationship work out. I was hesitant to do that at first. He was optimistic about it and I was the pessimistic one. I thought to myself, "Why would I deprive him of the chance to prove that there is a possibility that the relationship will work out?" I am hoping that we can fix this - it's still a work in progress though. I never thought that trials will come our way this early.
There's so much going on between us - issues and differences needs to be sorted out. In a relationship, it's not just about focusing on "ourselves". We have to consider the other party as well. The things we do affect us and our partner as well. Each and every move should be done carefully so not to hurt the other party. When we make decisions, we have to consult and consider the feelings of our partner. Otherwise, not doing so, will result to a conflict. Conflict that when ignored could ruin a relationship built and shared by two persons who are in love.
Sometimes, love confuses us. It's just up to us how we can get rid of that confusion. But, most of the time, it makes a lot of people turn their back on the relationship and leave one party behind. Everything happens for a reason. We just need to look for those reasons and use them in figuring out how to resolve issues we're dealing with. Always remember, "For every problem, there is always a solution." and all we have to do is find those solution that are beneficial for us.
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